And grapes and butter

There's knives and spoons

And lots of clutter

And I want to know

How does it go

Under the mistletoe

You'll be swindled and poof

So don't seem aloof

When you're done

Don't make a pun

Cause you could find lucky stars

Instead of driven cars

If you get invited up

Follow around like a "droopy-eyed pup"

There'd be a pop and a bang

And your ears will clang.

And it won't be all the same

If he plays the right game.

Keep very close,

And slide right down,

To find the two cousins,

And their yearning hound.

And when it's all finished,

And he promises he calls,

Just yell back at him:

"Honey, you got balls!"